I.V.Effed: No Sex, No Lies, and No Videotape

Where to begin?  I’ll start with the wedding this weekend.  It was nice to see my husband’s family–and we had a good time.  Was it a little overwhelming (at first) to see two cutely pregnant sisters there?  Yep.  But they were lovely and sweet and of course they love me just the same, even if I’m not pregnant.  They had nothing to do with the Unfortunate Wedding Incident, however.

Picture it: me, in my regular, non-pregnancy dress, just being happy for my sisters while trying not to think about my own empty utes.   I was instead just busy being happy for their good fortune, and enjoying a night in the city with my husband.  The ceremony is fine, the cocktail hour fine, and then we arrive at the reception location. 

 I am standing in between my inlaws, watching a few people gettin jiggy with it on the dance floor, waiting for the wedding party to be announced.  A very well dressed older woman comes over, and my mother in law introduces her as the grandmother of the groom.  I in turn introduce myself, and then she says, very loudly (both because she is old and because the music is very loud) “And you’re NOT pregnant” (clearly referencing the other knocked up family members). To my ears, it seemed to come out very, very, slowly from her lips….aaaaannnddd youuuuuu arreee nooooooottt preggnnnantt.

I cannot fully describe what happened to my insides.  I am pretty sure any emptiness I had already been feeling just stretched wide open, and my insides went numb and hollow.  I smiled, and said very clearly (wistfully?), “No.  I’m not pregnant.”  My inlaws then attempted to jump in with, “She has a wonderful two year old at home!” “He is such a joy!” “She and T have such a great little guy!”  And I stood there, perfectly still, and tried to say a few more things about whatever else I could think of (not much). 

When she left, I counted to five mississippi’s in my head, and then turned to my father in law and said I was going to find the restroom and would be right back ( I was smiley and upbeat.  I swear it!).  I ran into T out there, and at the sight of him my eyes welled up and he pulled me aside, surely there was some incident with the Pregnant Duo that upset me.  I tearfully explained everything, promising I would be fine as soon as I recounted everything…and I really was.  We went back in, and I was about to make a joke about it to my in-laws, when my father in law grabbed me, hugged me, apologized profusely, and wiped his eyes over and over.  Holy crap.  Known the man for eleven years, and had never seen him cry until this moment (he had consumed numerous martinis at this point which I am sure added to his emotion…but still).  He also later called me “His Hero” (Imagine my surprise to see him upright and hangover free the next morning!)

Seriously.  That is the kind of scenario that you sorta-imagine would happen when you’re envisioning Interacting With the Pregnant World, but then common sense tells you it never would…and then it does…?   I forgive Grams her stupidity because 1)she is old, and old people say very very stupid things.  I plan on taking advantage of that myself in 50 years, 2)in her oldness she must also be blind because my dress was in no way one that could be confused with a pregnancy dress, and 3)she is A Stranger Who Hasn’t A Clue.

Okay.  So on to Part Two .  We had relations this morning, and soon after there was some bright red blood.  Assumed it was from relations, or relations-plus-coculture-leftoverness, or a combination.  But the bright red spotting has continued.  So is this day 1?  I never have bright red immediately.  I don’t start my cycle this way…it’s more gradual.  I decide to call my nurse after a few more hours of this.  She is OUT of the office today.  Of COURSE she is.  And the message says to call the other number only if there is an emergency.  Is this an emergency?  Mmmm…don’t think so.  But if it is day 1, that means this cycle was 25 days (nurse did say the coculture might cause my period to start earlier).  Luckily, I came across the paperwork for the Priming Protocol, and it states that if I get my period prior to finishing the Ganirelix (last night was only shot one of three), I needed to finish the shots before coming in to the office.  So.  I will just check out the situation down there for the rest of the night and then call the office in the morning, but I will not be trying to fight through the morning snowstorm to get to the train at 6am to get in for the monitoring. 

T is always telling me, “It’s always something with you.”  It drives me nuts, but I guess he’s right.  I mean, REALLY, Grandma So-and-So and My Body?  You couldn’t make this eas(ier) for me?  I’m thinking then, that Wednesday is Start Day.  We’ll see (also, this early arrival now puts us likely dead-on for the huge meeting T has down South once a year and can’t miss…so we will likely be freezing some dudes, I’ll likely be HcG-ing my own rear…).  It’s always something…but maybe confusion and oddness on this end will mean babies on the other.

In: February 10 | | #